On Nov. 20, thousands in this country and around the world will hold vigils honoring the annual Trans Day of Remembrance, where the lives of transsexual and transgender people who lost their lives to hate-based violence will be acknowledged, with the high majority of victims on the list being Black and Latina women
I volunteer with Black Trans* Women's Lives Matter, a newly formed social justice campaign drawing attention to the epidemic of violence targeting women of color. When many Black activists say or tweet the newly popular "Black Lives Matter" slogan it appears what most actually mean is "Black Heterosexual Male Lives Matter".
When it's 'Black male on Black female' violence the public outcry is quieterand even quieter when the victims are specifically transsexual females. In response to this inconsistency we held a vigil and national 'call for peace' on Sept. 27 outside the Congressional Black Caucus Conference in Washington, D.C. which thankfully garnered national coverage and support.
Yet while some ground has been gained in shining a light on this crisis, in recent years many noted leaders in the trans* communities have been vocal about steps going backward, such as certain LGB non-profits co-opting our sacred TDOR vigil.
On Nov. 11, 2010, the actual founder of TDOR, Gwendolyn Smith, wrote in the Bay Area Reporter,
"Qtalk … asked … a panel of speakersincluding GLAAD President Jarrett Barrios … to talk about the recent rise in gay suicides due to bullying. The event has a $5 cover charge, and a two-drink minimum. … As its founder, I cannot help but cringe when [TDOR] is tacked onto a party. … As important as issues of bullying and suicide are, the Day of Remembrance should not be overshadowed for the sake of ratings or remaining topical. It is a somber, sobering event. … This is not a day to dance on our graves."
Two years later on Nov. 22, 2012, World Professional Association for Transgender Health president Jamison Green stated on Facebook that,
"Trans Day of Remembrance events should NEVER be used for fundraising or promotional efforts; that is my personal opinion. It is a misappropriation of the gravity and the spirit of trans resistance and our determination to overcome the ignorance and hatred that oppresses us."
Then last year Turner's LGBT group TurnOut literally hosted a Nov. 20 cocktail mixer followed by an 'Owning Your Safety' panel, which sends a problematic message that blames the victim.
In reality it is *not* their fault. Male violence is not these women's fault. Religious bigotry is not their fault. Stigmatizing defamation is not their fault. Unjust laws and corrupt courts are not their fault. Discrimination by insurance agents, healthcare companies and government agencies is not their fault. Hate-based murder is not their fault.
The high majority of women of color in the transsexual community personally know one or more transsexual female friends who was murdered in a hate crime, committed suicide, overdosed, fell to disease and/or had fatal black-market healthcare. While we will never forget the friends we've lost we must also remember to practice self-care and to make the most of this life. Most importantly, there are little girls, teenagers and young women who need us to be the big sisters, aunties and mothers that many of their own blood relatives failed in being.
Lives can be saved by pursuing more genuine preventative measures like adequate resources and outreach, well-thought-out strategies and affirming messaging. The national LGB political establishment has disproportionately prioritized gay marriage and so-called 'military rights' over the needs of at-risk trans* youth who are disowned by their families and/or denied sufficient government assistance. Who wants to fight wars overseas when there is a war here in the U.S. against our own? According to Maslow's Hierarchy's of Needs, gay marriage is a luxury when one does not even have a roof over their head or can't access needed healthcare. Housing assistance, employment opportunities/protections and transitional programs to help youth reach adulthood successfully are a must. The American Medical Association calls transition-related surgery and hormones "medically necessary" which is why providing financial aid for such treatment should be ranked a high priority.
This appropriation of TDOR by corporate gay and lesbian groups is alarmingly similar to the gay-revisionism and trans-erasure of Stonewall's history. Trans rights pioneer and Stonewall Riots veteran Miss Major Griffin-Gracy recently stated in Black Trans Women's Lives Matter's press release for our national 'call for peace', "In reality, Stonewall was a revolutionary riot in response to extreme brutality, not a whitewashed basket of happy rainbows or vanilla flavored wedding cake."
For the love of God, for the memory of our fallen and for the integrity of this annual vigil, the trans* community must preserve the authenticity of TDOR by all means necessary. To find a TDOR vigil near you please go to: tdor.info/ .
Journalist and media advocate Ashley Love has written for or has been interviewed by The New York Times, L.A. Times, BBC, BET, NPR, Reuters TV, Guardian, Washington Blade and Advocate about feminist, transsexual and social-justice issues. From hosting and co-writing MTV/Logo's edu-tainment series 'LGB to the T', authoring the Trans Forming Media blog or organizing Black Trans* Women's Lives Matter, she's devoted to raising trans* education and inspiring cultural change.